Perfectionism is like a perpetual report card – one that says: “could do better”. The problem I have with this kind of report is that it’s all judgment and no information. It leaves me wanting to know “how could I do better?”. And, also, “why should I?”.
Any effort can be negatively affected by perfectionism. Even in the case of a truly remarkable performance, there is usually be something that can be judged as less than perfect.
So ultimately, perfectionism is a way to feel miserable, no matter how well we have done. In this way, perfectionism is the enemy of the good – even the very good.
Perfectionism is also the enemy of beginning anything new. If we don’t know how to do something, which we won’t if it’s new, then we are highly unlikely to do it perfectly. This fact is so uncomfortable for some of us, that it often results in our decision to start nothing new.
Thus, if we allow it, perfectionism can keep us eternally confined to that, which we already know and know how to do. We must do our best to remember: “if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing badly”.
Acting and Learning
When starting any new venture, such as a business, a relationship or an artistic work, we must be willing to take action and to learn. ‘Mistakes’ are to be expected, and when we embrace this fact, we are more free to learn from those mistakes, and then to move on from them to the next steps in the process.
We must act on what we think might work, and then learn from the outcome of those actions. We alternate between doing and perceiving; acting and learning. As we do, we educate our perception; as we perceive more clearly, we can do better.
For instance, as someone learns to play an instrument s/he learns to hear music more acutely and mistakes more precisely, all the while gaining more pleasure in performing the music. As s/he hears more accurately, mistakes can then be corrected more readily, and playing can come with even greater pleasure and freedom of expression.
Acting and learning (and acting and learning, etc.) create a a virtuous cycle of educating our perceptions and increasing our skills. Oh, and notice that the viciousness of perfectionism has no place in this virtuous cycle.
I make more mistakes than anyone I know, and sooner or later, I patent most of them. Thomas Edison
Flickr Photo – You Ain’t Heard Nothin’ Yet by puuikibeach
Evan Hadkins, a partner in Authentic Abundance, blogs about self development.



Thanks so much for this wonderful post, Evan. For me, perfectionism can also be viewed as a defense mechanism of sorts, protecting an individual from unpleasant (even ‘scary’) feelings of insecurity. Courage to be oneself, regardless of the outcome of one’s thoughts or actions, can serve as an antidote to perfectionism.
Love what you shared about mistakes ~ agree. Over the years I’ve come to feel that there really are no mistakes, but rather life or soul lessons that are presented to us, creating opportunities for growth, expansion and boundless exploration of possibilities. In all the creativity training I’ve participated in, ‘mistakes’ are strongly encouraged, even nurtured – mirroring Edison’s quote above. Thank you for the powerful reminder.
Thanks Lil, I have found the idea that ‘There are no mistakes only feedback’ to be liberating. It may not be entirely true but it certainly helped set me free. Thanks for your comment.
I think that I love the quote: “if something is worth doing, it’s worth doing badly.” It pretty much should sap the fear out of anyone about to take a risk. I’m going to try it out on a stalled painting.
Hi Evan,
What a great topic this is! I honestly think that perfectionism is one of the main obstacles for co-creating authentic abundance; it’s something we must learn to “get over”.
I also love your quote: “Thus, if we allow it, perfectionism can keep us eternally confined to that, which we already know and know how to do.” I don’t know about you, but this is my definition of a “rut” — comfy sometimes but confining always
Thanks for this article!
Nancy
Nancy Boyd recently posted..11-11 Phenomenon Continues With 4-11- the Next in the 11-11 Series for 2011
Hi Nancy, now you mention it, I do think that is a pretty fair definition of a rut. Like you I do think that perfectionism is something we need to get over as we co-create abundance.
Love the Thomas Edison quote – for me, it’s often been when I have “made mistakes” which have led to greater success – a better idea or result and I never would have arrived there without experiencing the “failures.”
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